Mindset: Your Secret Weapon
What you think, you feel, you do. The power of mindset in negotiation.
The Weekly Walkaway highlights negotiation in its ‘good’, ‘bad’ and sometimes ‘downright ugly’ forms. Issue No. 88 (27th September 2024).
Introduction
My youngest son is six coming on seven, a proper pocket rocket. He is often frustrated that he can’t ‘solve that puzzle’, ‘build that lego set’, ‘throw that ball’. Shouting at the world ‘I CAN’T DO IT!!’. And a phrase I sometimes use to help him cope with his temporary crisis of confidence is;
“What you think, you feel, you do.”
This relates to the cognitive behavioural triangle , credited to Aaron T. Beck in the 1960’s;
The power of mindset in negotiation
It got me thinking about the power of mindset in negotiation and when it comes to negotiation, mindset can significantly help shape positive outcomes.
Michael Phelps, the most decorated olympian of all time has often stated that his ‘inner game’ through visualisation has been a big part of his success story. And no doubt, Bob Bowman, his coach, was a major factor in this success:
Michael Phelps on the subject of Visualisation:
“What you want it to be, What you don’t want it to be, What it could be”
The power of this mental rehearsal can’t be overstated—it boosts your confidence, and keeps you focused on the end goal.
So here’s the thing: if you don’t believe in the value you bring, why should anyone else?
Shift your focus to what you’re good at. Reflect on past successes, think about the expertise and experience you’ve gained, and recognise that you deserve to be at that table.
What You Think: Shaping Perception
Positive vs. Negative Framing: Think of it like this: if you see the negotiation as a golden opportunity (instead of some dreaded challenge), you're setting yourself up to win. A positive mindset lets you focus on solutions, not problems, and gets you into "let’s make this happen" mode. But if you walk in with a negative mindset, suddenly every minor hiccup feels like a mountain to climb, and you're stuck seeing roadblocks instead of possibilities.
Growth vs. Fixed Mindset: A growth mindset enables you to view setbacks as learning opportunities, which encourages persistence and creative problem-solving during negotiation. When things don’t go as planned, a growth mindset helps you roll with the punches, learn, and adapt. It’s the fuel for persistence and creativity. On the flip side, if you’re rocking a fixed mindset, the moment something goes sideways, you’re tempted to pack up and call it a day. limiting the potential outcomes.
What You Feel: Emotional Regulation
Confidence vs. Doubt: Your internal thoughts directly affect your emotions. If you think you can succeed, you feel more confident, which reflects in your body language and tone. Confidence in negotiation allows for more assertive and convincing communication.
Managing Stress: It’s normal, we’ve all been there. Negotiations can feel intense, but here’s the trick: when you manage your thinking, you can keep that stress in check. Stay cool, stay composed. A calm mind helps you regulate your emotions, and that means no rash decisions driven by panic or fear. You’re in control, and when you’re in control, you make better calls—calls that lead to winning
What You Do: Translating Thoughts and Feelings into Action
Strategic Thinking: Your thoughts influence the way you act. A constructive mindset allows you to think clearly, strategise effectively, and adjust your approach based on the evolving dynamics of the negotiation.
Body Language and Presence: A positive and confident mindset influences your physical presence. If you believe in your value, it shows in your posture, eye contact, and gestures, which can have a powerful impact on your negotiation partner.
Mindset alone isn’t enough—you’ve got to be prepared.
Think of mindset as a muscle: the more you prepare, the stronger it gets. Walking into a negotiation unprepared is like showing up to a marathon without ever having run before—you’re setting yourself up for failure. But when you’ve done the homework, you walk in ready. You know the lay of the land, and that gives you the upper hand.
So, what does proper preparation look like?
Start by diving deep into the client’s business. Understand their goals, their pain points, and the specific challenges they’re facing. Maybe they’re under pressure to cut costs, or perhaps they’re dealing with operational inefficiencies that are slowing them down.
Whatever it is, the more you know, the more confidently you can position yourself as the solution. Know their competitors, their industry trends, and most importantly, how you fit into their big picture. When you’ve done your homework, you’re not just talking—you’re solving their problems. And that makes you invaluable.
Create a Game Plan
Think of the negotiation like a chess match—you don’t make your first move without a strategy. Map out the different scenarios that could come up. What’s your ideal outcome? What’s your minimum acceptable offer? What are you willing to compromise on? By outlining these ahead of time, you can navigate the negotiation with clarity and confidence, without being thrown off by curveballs.
Know Your Numbers
This isn’t the time to guess or "wing it." Know the financials inside and out. If you’re going to negotiate price, make sure you have a solid grasp on your pricing structure, costs, and what’s negotiable. You don’t want to undersell yourself, but you also want to be able to justify your value with real data. When you can back up your ask with numbers, you’re showing the client that you’re not just confident—you’re credible.
Role-Play
One of the best ways to boost your confidence is through practice. Find a colleague or mentor and role-play the negotiation. You can even take it up a notch by practising with someone who throws tough questions your way or pushes back on your terms. The more comfortable you are dealing with objections in practice, the more effortlessly you’ll handle them in real-time.
Summary
In the end, negotiation is as much about preparation and strategy as it is about mindset. By harnessing the power of your thoughts and emotions, you can shape not only your own approach but also how others perceive you. Confidence, positivity, and a growth mindset empower you to see opportunities instead of obstacles, to stay calm under pressure, and to act decisively. Coupled with preparation and a solid game plan, your mindset becomes a crucial tool in achieving the outcomes you desire. Remember
Success in negotiation starts with what you think, how you feel, and how you carry yourself—so believe in your value, and others will too.
Thats all folks
Good luck out there!
Over n Out
